FULL MOON in Taurus 10/24 :: Emotional Body Electric a.k.a. Love-Powered Change
You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.
~Mary Oliver, from her poem ‘Wild Geese’
Is someone out there, keeping track of my every move? Is someone tallying tick marks for each time I think a derogatory thought, or act in fear instead of love, or miss the mark in any particular way? Tick marks for every time I cross the line of goodness? If not, then where does the voice come from that insists that My Nature is not enough? Life is begging the question of me of late. And the answer is FUCK THAT SHIT. Fabricated costume of unworthiness, woven in fear of freedom, it’s time for you to die.
To simply be me, or to control for effect? To let others be, or to control them for effect? The newness of this full moon in Taurus conjunct Uranus is palpable. We can be brand new by shucking off the methods of control we have exerted over ourselves in order to be “good” or “okay”, whatever realm that plays into for you (check your chart for the location of 1 degree 13 minutes of Taurus, and the opposite of that at 1 degree 13 minutes of Scorpio, where the sun is. Or don’t check your chart if you don’t want to, and just let these words be what they are to you, plain and simple.). Anxiety is a heightened sense of feeling unsafe, very not okay, disembodiment, primarily in the mind, like a looming dangerous being is waiting to punish and maim us for being such miserable beings. What if you remembered what it felt like to feel good in your body without shame? Taurus’ planetary ruler is Venus, who is retrograde in Scorpio (basically conjunct the sun, opposite the moon and Uranus). If you were to ask yourself honestly, what do you most value (Venus) that you are working to achieve/attain/be? Feeling good in our bodies (Taurus, sensuality) is the starting point for feeling good in the world, and for doing things that make us (and others [Scorpio]) feel good in the world (and in their bodies). You want change for the better (Uranus, Scorpio)? Practice what you believe. Start in your earthly existence.
Our bodies are containers for our spirit, and they are very good at keeping us safe, keeping us focused into one particular place in spacetime. You are where you are right now and that is not a mistake.
Can you let the soft animal of your body love what it loves? What about letting it hurt where it hurts?
The moon rules emotions and emotional experiences, which leave imprints on our psyches and perceptions (Uranus) and in our tissues (Taurus, physical body, senses). And, turns out, positive feeling can get stuck/lodged/forgotten in the body just as well as negative feeling. What emotional experiences are in your body that are crying for release? What new thing do you want to do that your past experiences are coloring? What are the things you used to LOVE freely and free of guilt? Could remembering/reflecting (Moon) you at your most WELL state (Taurus) be a key to healing (Scorpio) your present day (Sun) and future (Uranus) experience?
If Facebookery and InstagramNation tells you you’re not quite good enough yet, will you believe it? If a mainstream news channel tells you what is most important for you to pay attention to today, does that make it so? If a spiritual teacher tells you something is wrong with you, does that make it true? Who is your authority in how you should move and breathe in the world? Have you relegated it to anyone other than your deepest realest self?
When working with the body and emotions in healing, remember to be patient (Taurus). Painful memories (moon) can rise up out of nowhere (Uranus) and your instinct (Scorpio) may be to browbeat yourself (Scorpio) for how you have “failed” and how you “should have known better” and how you “wouldn’t be in this mess if you hadn’t fucked up x-y-z in the first place”. Try mercy, even when, no - ESPECIALLY WHEN you feel you don’t deserve it. You could never do anything to “deserve” loving yourself. Self-love is not earned, it is your natural state. We only tell ourselves that we don’t deserve to love ourselves and disconnect from our authentic, spontaneous nature, and that is an absolute lie. When you truly love yourself you can make positive changes that STAY. When you try to make changes motivated by shame or fear, then once that shame and fear dissipates so do the changes you were making, since they were completely based on fear of punishment or of not being good enough in the first place. Many times they were not changes that needed to be made in the first place when they are motivated by fear and self-loathing.
Surrender your need to be good. No one can tell you that you are not, and if they do it will only take root in you if part of you believes the same thing. Let go of your need to “seem” good or woke, or to figure out all of the “why’s” of what life is showing you. Like water off a duck’s back, your self-knowing and self-trust in your ability to See is a strong container for your spirit, much like the body. Bring your wisdom down from the ether into your earthly life, where it truly matters (get it, “matter”? Earth realm? ;)). This is embodying Taurus energy with the jolts of newness and insight from Uranus, and this full moon presents the strength, ability and wisdom to let go of everything that isn’t YOURS, enabling you to truly move and breathe and share and love from a place of radical, world-changing authenticity, starting in your own bodily existence. Let it be enough. <3
Integration Participation Lightning Bolts ::
~ dance. dance your emotions. thrash, thrust, thrill.
~ self-massage. anywhere that wants it.
~ find a patch of soft earth and lay your body down. close your eyes.
~ let yourself think about the things you’ve been avoiding thinking about. let them feel how they will. take as long as it takes.
~ say what you need to say. say to others, say to yourself. know which is which.
~ make the meal you’ve been longing for. bring loved ones in to collaborate and share. feast.
~ sing. sing the sounds that words can’t express. purr. howl. roar.
Eden Marie Peach
IG: @eden.earthytoes.137 (personal) and @earthytoes.137 (arts biz)